| 词汇 |
堵 |
正文 |
心里堵堵的，来这个小镇工作快三个周了，心情几乎没有舒畅过。来到陌生的环境，人生地不熟，语言不通，没有一个朋友可以交流相处。自己又不会打交道，貌似有所谓的社交恐惧症。刚刚来就想逃离，很想离开，可是，至少两年以后才可以再考公务员。只恨自己没能力，不能适应新的环境。
心里有太多太多顾虑，怕这怕那的，不敢多说话，不知道怎么做事，又很担心别人的眼光。在静下来的时候。老往坏的方面想，感觉很压抑。好几个晚上都做很长很长，又很累很累的梦，梦里面的自己也是很压抑。每次想哭，却不敢哭，因为我是男子汉，不能轻易掉眼泪。
很想大声说话，很想和每个人热情地聊天，很想找个人去打乒乓球，很想好好地工作……可是现实呢，不敢有所为，仿佛吃了迷药，说话做事都很迟钝，嘴唇太厚张不开……
很想找个地方放松放松，找回好心情，可是就像歌里唱的，没钱没时间。很想跑步，挥洒出很多很多汗；很想去哪遥远的海边看看，看那辽阔，听那波涛；很想和远方的朋友倾诉内心的苦闷，很想有人告诉我该怎么办……
也许，就像他们说的，适应了就好了，刚开始都是这样的。可是，我好怕，好怕会一直这样下去。
快让堵着的心解放吧！
我要多找点事做，发现现在的好。我虽然不会说话，但我要对每个人微笑，不懂的地方要虚心请教。虽然周围都是高山围堵着，天空也显得很狭窄，但是只要学会欣赏，而不是抱怨，回看到这里的好处。虽然我不打篮球，但还有其他方式和人们交流。虽然我很怕人情世故，请客喝酒，但是总归要习惯……
坚强些吧，会熬过去的。
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